Like most introverts I do better in small groups (2-4 people) and like 1:1 time spent with a close friend as opposed to large group parties and events where I tend to feel lost and invisible. I don't have the gift of "small talk" - I can wing it for awhile but then feel exhausted afterwards. I don't mind attending "games night" or "progressive euchre nights" because there is an activity that we are all involved in but having to "mingle" at a party is difficult and I tend to avoid those.
In speaking with my introverted brother he admitted that he sometimes "lies" to others who are requesting him to attend certain social functions because he really doesn't want to go. So he'll invent something in order to bow out gracefully. I had to laugh at that because sometimes I do the same thing! I now find myself really weighing whether I want to attend certain events or not and if I don't want to go I don't. Sometimes I make up a reason and sometimes (depending on the event and people involved) I can explain myself honestly.
My real friends know me well and understand but there are others who don't get it. But I'm at the point in my life now when I feel I can and should do exactly what I want. If I don't want to go to something then I don't go; instead of suffering through it, regretting the time wasted and swearing to myself I'll never do that again. So that's why I love this quotation below which Meryl Streep quoted as words she lives by. (Original author is Jose Micard Teixeira)
It's all about being honest - with yourself and with others.
“I no longer have patience for certain things, not because I’ve become arrogant, but simply because I reached a point in my life where I do not want to waste more time with what displeases me or hurts me. I have no patience for cynicism, excessive criticism and demands of any nature. I lost the will to please those who do not like me, to love those who do not love me and to smile at those who do n
Update: originally written by self-help author José Micard Teixeira.
|So I cut my own hair!|
And there's nothing wrong with that!