Showing posts with label break up. Show all posts
Showing posts with label break up. Show all posts

Monday, January 27, 2014

Back in the Saddle


I need to acknowledge all of you who commented on my last post (and emailed me) because you, my friends, don't pass off platitudes as caring - you really DO care. If you haven't read those comments please do. I felt such genuine kindness and support and it makes a big difference in my day. I wanted to share Louise's comment because it really helped put perspective on things - while the breakup came as a total shock to me it wasn't such a shock to Michael as he had  already done the thinking about it and the planning and had processed it whereas I was at square one - total bewilderment, loss, heartbreak and grief. And now throw in some anger. 
Here's her comment:
((hugs)) jane. I used to work as a marriage counsellor and we know that the person who initiates the breakup copes better because they have already been through the doubts, anxieties, fears and grief as part of coming to their decision. So by the time they announce it they are already well down the track to adjusting to the change
The person who doesn't initiate the breakup usually had no idea it was coming. It hits like a bolt out of the blue and suddenly their world has changed with no chance to prepare. So for them the grief, anxieties and fears then begin and they are at a totally different stage to the other person.
It's a roller coaster for a while. Just do whatever you need to do to get through each day ((hugs))
Thanks Louise - that helps and so did all of your comments. (*Judy for some reason my reply to your comment just keeps spinning - not sure why?)
So did I start putting one foot in front of the other after writing that post? Yes, I did. I put on some music and did some more painting in the kitchen - trim, pantry door, above the cupboards AND the ceiling!  Now I have some physical aches and pains to divert me from my mental aches and pains. The I baked a huge tray full of seasoned french fries - potatoes, sweet potato, turnip and carrots. I also baked a tray full of tilapia fillets so had my own weird version of "fish and chips" for dinner. 
I made lots of juice and also some refrigerator oatmeal. Go here for some awesome "cold oatmeal" recipes that are SOOOOO delicious!
On Saturday night I picked up a friend and we went to another friend's house. We played a game called "Cards against Humanity"  which is not a game for the faint of heart!! I thought I was going to die laughing!! You have to check it out!!  Totally politically incorrect but SOOO funny! That of course made my good endorphins flow like crazy :) Just what I needed. 
This morning Kazi and I "face timed" with each other which is an iPhone way to talk (and see) each other for FREE! She told me all about her weekend trip to Sydney and I showed her all of the snow that she's missing and also our very old kitty. We're going to do that again tonight so she can "show me around" the area she's staying at on the Gold Coast.
I thought we were going to have a snow day today because I awoke to another foot of snow and the roads were an absolute MESS!  The powers that be decided to cancel ALL of the school buses but keep the schools open!?!  Today was an exam day and they postponed the exam until tomorrow. I had 1 parent call me and she drove her son into school. So there was me and 6 EAs all fighting over 1 student lol! He was very popular!! Now I'm home and will be tackling my school work again once I finish eating my lunch. I just didn't want to wait too long to thank you all! 
THANK YOU!!